The Little Things: Rules!

One of the first phrases you hear when learning German is Alles in Ordnung (lit., everything's in order). At first it seems like one of those things someone says in a parody sketch. But then you notice you hear it pretty regularly.

The current scandals with falsified car emissions, DeutscheBank, and Siemens aside, Germans really do seem to appreciate rules and order. I can agree; things tend to go better when everyone has the same understanding of expectations. But sometimes it seems the rules take over at the expense of common sense or compromise.

Bureaucracy

I’ve said it before and it still amazes me: It doesn’t matter in what arena of life, if you sign up or register for something in Germany, a forest of paper will follow. 

“Get it in writing” is not just a recommendation here, it’s a mandate. 

No wonder, then, with so much correspondence to track, that things get lost in the shuffle. Our unfortunate experience with this had to do with Larry’s unemployment. 

The debacle around applying for unemployment is a story for another day, but when Larry started his job here in Munich, unemployment wasn’t notified, and they paid his benefit that month. 

Of course, we received a letter when they (and I) noticed, but there were no instructions on how to remedy the situation. Instead, the instructions came in a subsequent letter, and I dutifully followed them to make a refund via bank transfer well before the stated deadline. 

Well apparently no one checked, because we received another, threatening letter (dated before the original deadline and after we’d already made our payment) saying Larry was in violation of regulation XYZ and now needed to appear in person at the unemployment office in Munich to explain himself. 

Larry, along with our pile of paperwork and his HR manager, did just that. The Munich folks looked at everything and said the Hamburg folks must be crazy, then naturally filed more paperwork to confirm Alles in Ordnung.

Driving

I’m pretty sure most Germans would be horrified to know in the U.S. you can sleep through a semester-long class in high school, cram to pass a written test, and if you don’t damage any property in your road test, you’ll probably be given a license to operate a ton of fun on four wheels.

Getting a German driver’s license (I’ve heard) means significant study time and can cost thousands of Euros. Around 30% of folks who take the written test don't pass the first time, you must attend an official driving school, and there's a first-aid training requirement as well. It may be strenuous, but there’s certainly a degree of comfort in that, considering the largely speed-limit-free Autobahn.

House Rules

Our apartment in Hamburg had house rules written into the lease, and it’s easy enough to be quiet between 10 PM and 7 AM. Our Munich lease takes that a step further, however, and also deems the hours between noon and 3 PM as quiet time. That made getting settled in a bit challenging, since I had to remember to only rearrange furniture or hang pictures outside of those midday hours.

We’ve also had a couple of “incidents” to remind us how things work. The first happened shortly after we moved in. 

We had hurriedly unloaded the bikes from the moving truck and locked them together in our building’s secured bike alley. Several days later we found a handwritten note on our bikes which roughly translated to:

Whose bikes are these? Kindly separate them and arrange them properly. 

Turns out that in addition to looking like a jumbled mess, one of our bikes was facing the wrong way in the orderly queue of the lane.

The second incident was much more stressful. Several days after we'd had a small sofa bed delivered, I got a text from our landlady asking to confirm the delivery was ours. She then said I needed to call one of the representatives on the building’s board, because the rep had filed an incident report of damage to the building during the delivery. 

Thankfully the woman noticed my obvious terror (which came more from having to speak German on the phone than anything else), and reassured me it was not that bad.

Essentially, she saw something and followed procedure, and the building administrators would contact us if we needed to pay anything. 

Turns out the “damage” was streaks on a hallway wall from the sofa fabric, which I guess the cleaning lady was able to take care of when she came the following week.

Language.

One of the things I like most about learning German is the clear set of rules. On the whole, it’s a fairly logical language. So I’m always surprised when I hear people say it has too many exceptions. 

I think English-speakers forget that English is more about the exceptions to the rule than the rule. Don’t believe me? Think about some of the errors little kids make because they’re trying to apply the rules (I growed that, she put the knifes on the table, we were loster than you were, etc.).

Germany actually has a Spelling Council to resolve changes in the way words are presented. Talk about order!

Online Security

Forget about mere passwords and PINs. Yes, you’ll need both to access your online banking here, but for certain transactions (transfers and some online credit card purchases), you also need to download and register a security app.

To complete your transaction, a QR code pops up, you scan it with the app, and you get a unique number you have to enter to confirm the transfer or purchase. A pain to set up, sometimes annoying to use, but overall a good use of procedure for peace of mind.

Recycling

There are many, many guidelines around sorting trash, which I mentioned in a post on my previous blog. By now I've got my sorting system and schedule down. 

But here's another example of where the rules are a bit stricter than Hamburg, in that here you can only deposit your bottles in the street bins on workdays between 7 AM and 7 PM.

The Unspoken Rules

There are enough challenges navigating a different culture and language--try adding on top those rules that aren't discussed, but you have to figure out and follow anyway: 

• Although things slowed down in certain seasons in Hamburg, it was not as common there as it is here in Munich to find restaurants, shops, and services (e.g. medical offices) shutting down for vacation or extended holidays. You just have to anticipate and plan ahead.

• In Hamburg it might have been considered odd to make eye contact with a stranger, but in Munich it is apparently not at all odd to stare at people you don’t know. I have learned to stop being offended by it, and assume it is appreciation for the outfit I’m wearing that day. 😏

• Around the time of the sofa incident, we purchased some plants and window boxes. Although we don't have a patio or window ledges like most of the other apartments, we thought we might use part of the gutter extensions to hold some flowers and herbs. 

         We explained our idea to one of 

         Larry’s German colleagues, and got a 

         look that was one part shock and one 

         part pity at our naivete. 

         So, in the interest of avoiding a future
         phone call for an incident report about 
         our illegal use of space, some plants 

         (and our window garden dream) had 
         to die.

So glad I always take my clothes out of the
drying room by the next day...

• Earlier this week, after formally introducing herself to me when we met in the building's drying room, one of my neighbors proceeded to chatter away while we hung our clothes. 

         I only understood about half of what 
         she was saying, but certainly 
         understood her conspiratorial aside
         about the unknown person who had 
         left their comforter in the drying 
         room for two weeks now (!)

Exceptions

Of course, there are always going to be folks who disobey the rules. 

Although I’m always surprised at how neatly trash is piled up around overflowing public park bins on nice weekends, there are instances where trash cans have clearly been rummaged, probably for recyclables that carry a Pfand (deposit).

Ignorance of the rules is a hard excuse to make,
especially in the case of public transportation 
and ticket validation, when all stations 
have the rules posted at the entrances.

While most people obey the traffic signals, there are those who cross illegally despite disapproving bystanders. (Seriously, I've seen people glare daggers at jaywalkers.) Joggers in particular don't spend a lot of time waiting for the green, because they are undoubtedly on a schedule to get in some fitness before a day of work.

And I'm surprised it doesn't happen more often given the honor system approach to public transportation, but I have seen people who try to buck the system and get a hefty ticket for not having a valid fare card.

Toeing the Line
Most advice sites and blogs for expats strongly emphasize following the rules to fit in when you live in Germany. 

Yeah, it chafes a bit when, for example, you're not used to registering each time you move cities, you have to pay the government a fee for radio and TV even if you don't use or even own a radio or TV, and you find you have to conform to significant public pressure. 

I think it's part of the reason Germans have a reputation for being a bit rigid and mirthless. But this is not a society of automatons who act without independent thinking--I've certainly heard Germans grumble about the rules and red tape. 

I think it's less about lauding the procedures and regulations, and more about the end result. Because if the day-to-day is operating smoothly, that leaves more time for enjoying food, friends, and beer, and less time for sweating the details.

And in that regard, Alles in Ordnung.